My Approach to Psychotherapy

My approach to psychotherapy is grounded in a philosophy that relationships are vital for survival and necessary for growth. Often, however, people experience disconnections from others. The resulting isolation can be a major source of suffering. Although we deeply desire and need emotional connections, many are reasonably apprehensive about the risks involved in moving into vulnerable spaces, which is often necessary for intimacy. As a result, one may keep parts of themselves hidden or silenced. This serves an important protective function, which must be honored and understood with compassionate curiosity.

In response to past hurts, misunderstandings, invalidations, unresponsiveness, losses, and traumas, among other painful experiences, individuals resourcefully develop strategies to avoid further pain and disconnection. One might quiet a need, distance from others, or engage with life inauthentically. Paradoxically, though, these ways of existing contribute to separation, and a sense of being unseen and unrecognized. Sometimes, expectations of others anchor people in the past and limit possibilities for satisfying relationships in the present.

Therapy can offer a safe space to relinquish unproductive patterns, modify rigid expectations of others, and consider new, more balanced and flexible ways of relating.